Results....

I get back my paper already....
I am thankful cos i pass all my exam.....
Thank god...
But i need to work hard....

This trials has make me weaker and easily get sick...
Time to work hard and take care of my health...
Kampate....

Love.....

Love....
Wat is it....
Until now i still don know....

But to me,
sometime it is sweet...
sometime it is happiness...
sometime it is hurting people....
sometime it is breakng people into pieces....

If i can let you go, i will...
If this will make you happy, i will...
I know i cannot promise you anything....
But if it is beneficial to you, i will do....

Time to let go.....
I know is super hard....
I don want it to affect me anymore....

But still i want to thank you for being your friend....
It is you who help me in my exam...
It is you who help me to become a better pianist...
It s you who help in my serving....

I want to thank you cos you are special....
Hope that one day i can let it go...
And i don want you to know...
I don want our friendship to be affected....

Stay strong starry....
You can do it....

Special Sunday - 27/9/2009

Why i call this special.....
Cos i ponteng....
I did not go to church....

There i something happen in kl....
So, my dad and my grandparents go back to kl....
He drove my car.
So i went back to my grandmother's house.
My sis go and stay in an aunty's house.

I thought my grandparents went back....
I feel so happy....
But i have to take one day off for duty....

Sorry everyone who work with me....
I cannot come....
And i think i create some trouble....
Sorry.....

I have a wonderful time in kota tinggi....
But then, my nightmare come back...
Cos my grandparents come to stay with me again....
Haiz....
I only happy for one day....
But i know i still got lesson to learn...
kampate...
I know i can do it....

Going back to kota tinggi....

Kota Tinggi is where i grew up....
Since the day i came to this earth, i been staying in there until i am 7 years old...
My grandmother's houuse is at kota tinggi....
I always go there during holiday....

It is been a long time for me to go back.....
After 4 months time, i went back....

Sorry to my school friends and church friends....
My school friend invite me to go out with them on wednesday....
M church friends ask me to go out with them on thursday....
I am sorry cos i need to went back to kota tinggi....

On wednesday, i drive there with my mum beside....
My sis go there with my dad....
My dad car is a bit lousy la....
Cos we start our journey the same time,
But i reach first..... So happy....
Then we have fun there playing with my cousins....
I also help them in their computer stuff...
Although i am not that good la.....

On thursday we celebrate my cousins birthday...
Two of my cousins ' birthday is near....
So we have a small party....
Then, we chat, play and have fun.....
I went back home on thursday....

Sorry i cannot often come back to kota tinggi....
But i will try my best to go back...
I think i will be back after my stpm....
See you all....

Sorry i cannot went out with you.....
I hope we still have chances to went out together next time.....

I love you all....
Both my friends and my dearest family.....
And also my godbrothers and godsisters.....

Kukup Trip...

First time going out with this group of friends.....
The trip is fun....
I get to know some friends better....
I make some new friends....

When we went there, i don feel like sitting next to my sister....
Cos feeling a bit weird....
Everytime we went to trip, usually we are not sitting next to each other....
So, i sit with my godbrother.....
my sister sit with my friend....

When we reach there after one and a half hour time,
we go for lunch....
We went to a better restaurant for lunch,
But at there, is too full....
So we went to a ok ok one....
The dishes is so little...
Not enough for us to eat...
Everyone get one little share...
Therefor we eat a lot of rice to keep ourself full....
I eat 3 bowl of rice le....

Den i saw them throwing tea thatwe cannot finish into the sea....
cos kukup is a kampung build on sea....
The sea is so so dirty....
The villagers there pollute the sea...
We, tourist also play a part in the pollution....

When we walk to the resort where we are staying,
There are a lot of rubbish floating on the sea....
In the resort, we can see fly everwhere...
And is kind of disgusting seeng a lot of flies in there and everywhere.......

Th aircon there is super cool....
We on the aircon whole day....
During night time, we feel so cold like winter....

We have icebreaker and only simple into.....
Cos most of them know each other very well...
Only some that are new and not belong to the team are requsted to have an intro....

Then we hve bbq....
The ppl there bbq for us...
We just need to wait and eat....
I like the pudding there....
Corn favour...
The bbq is quite nice.....

Then, we have free times....
We play a lot of different type of games...
Our favourite is majong.....
We play through out the night....
Until next morning 5 something only we go to sleep....
This is the second time i did that....
Is just a friendly game....
Does not involve gambling...
Most of us stay out during night,
Except for aunties and some.....
So most of us wake up very late on the next day....
Some of them cannot sleep cos the aircon is too cold....
We comtiue to play then we went back to jb....

On the trip back, one of the aunty take her video cam to record when we are sleeping.....
A lot of ugly picture in it...
Den we went back home....

During trip, there is 2 person that i dislike....
First one is a girl......
She talks a lot ....
Some is nonsense....

Second one is a guy.....
Who think he knows everything.....
But actually not....
Is a very sarcastic person.....
Like to look down on people.....
Think tat people cannot be better than him...
He thinks himself is so cool.....
I think is digusting and sarcastic....

I just need time to adapt so i can work with them next time....
I am not the same as my appearance....
Time to adjust my attitute...
KAMPATE....

Kukup...

Tomorow i am going to kukup....
With my church friends....
A brand new experience...
Cos i never been to kukup with this group of friends....
I have been to kukup for 2 times...
This is the 3 times....
Each times with different group of friends...
Each time a brand new experience....
This time i am going with my real sister and my godbrother....

You may be wondering why i write real sister,
Because i got godsister too.....

Waiting for tomorrow trip....

My nightmare..........

I think my friends know....
My nightmare refers to my grandmother who came from kl.
She came here for about one month....
I hate her.....
Cos i really cannot stand her 'pattern', her ways of doing things, and her character...
She is really really really weird.....

First, my sister and i stay at home during last holidays....
We are not going out...
We are staying in our house....
She worry that we have no food to eat just because our parents is not around....
When we say that we don want to eat, she use a very pityful sound and nag you until she sees you eating....
I was like walao ei.........
This is my home....
MY HOME LE....
Not kl, not outside but my house....
There is a lot of biscuits and maggi mee and other food.....
She is blind a......
Can't she see that there are plenty of food.....
And she is still worry about us that we are hungry...

Then she say later you got gastric la....
You know how painful is it when you have gastric....
I wanted to tell her that....
'Don you know i got gastric???
I know how it is feel like???
I not need you to tell me all that....'
I don want her to use her PRETENDING sound....
Disgusting and Sarcastic.........

Secondly, she is like a person who seems like know the bible so well and yet go and watch horror movie and get so scared.....
She scared of ghost....
I was like ' walao ei.....
Even my sister and i who don know the bible so well know clearly that we are not suppose to watch horror movie....
And she, the so called holy herself go and watch horror movie....
Don you know it is wrong...
She is sarcastic......
She is like crying so pityful.........

The story is like that...
My grandfather who is also from kl...
sees her leg swing here and there....
So, he go and grabbed her leg....
Then, my grandmother got so shocked and scared...
She scared that the ghost go and touch here...
Walao ei....
Can you believe this....
This word came out from a person whom so called holy......
SARCASTIC.......

She is like so pityful but no one took pity on her....
Cos is " zi zhao de"
If you did not watch horror movie, you will not be scare.....
Then this thing will not happen...
Wat, cannot sleep a...... Hard to breath a....
And she does not realise is her fault....
Then she keep on tell us,
If u want to wake people up.....
U cannot grab someone's hand or leg,
But shake that person.........

Thirdly, she like to nag.....
She can nag from morning to night.....non stop.....
Talking about wat has she been through....
I was like' can you stop talking????'
She go and talk me when i study for my trials.....
I was so so angry...
I go and complain to my mum....
Is she blind???
Can she see that i am working hard???
Still come and ask me something that she knows....
I don know does she really knows
But but but to me, it really sound like she knows and she purposely come and ask you......
After that she does not come and kacau me cos my mum go and ask her not to kacau me ....
Her reaction is "i know. I know..."
Know your head la.....
U know still come and kacau me until my mum go and say to you that please stop talking or nagging to me,
Den only u stop....
SARCASTIC................

What i hate the most is whenever she cannot win my dad in a so called debate, She will catch my grandfather and scold him.....
I still remeber that time....
Cos her thinking is so so weird....
Then my dad sort of scold her cos of her wrong doing....
I forget wat topic already.....
My dad wins the debate....
My dad say her until she cannot defend herself or talk back....
Then she catch my grandfather and scold....
After the scolding, she go outside and cry....
My grandfather and my dad went to thier rooms seperately....
My mum, my sis and i does not involve in it....
So we sit down there and talk like normal....
Den my dad came and join us....
I admit that the atmosphere is a bit weird....
Cos she is sitting outside to gain some compassion...
But we just ignore her...
Cos she is acting....
Very obvious....
When my parents went out,
Immediately, she came inside the house.....
Don know wat she do.....
Later she comtinue her act......
Until my parents come back....
Until we want to sleep...
Only she come in and sleep.....
SARCASTIC.....

She has the potential to be actoress....
Wat kind of person you are, people can see one....
No need to pretend who u are not.....
I hate her so much.....
There is more for me to complain....
But i cannot tell her off like that....
I only tell my parents and my sis....
We are like no freedom in our own home....
My sis say that we are like in kl....
Lock in house....No where to go....
Don know wat to do.....

There is so much more to write but i think next time.....
Haiz.............
Human are complicated......
I am complicated too.....
WAITING FOR HER TO RETURN TO KL......
There will be celebration for the end of suffering..........

**I think some will hard to believe that is me....
But wat i write here is true.....
This is the real me.... I am complicated

Exam is over......

My trials is over....
Finally....
During this period of time, a lot of things happen.....
Got good times and bad times...
Stay strong and happy...

STPM LEFT ONE AND A HALF MONTH........
A.............
Scary.....
Need to start prepare for exam.........
KAMPATE..............

I am very scare that i cannot score very well in this exam....
Cos is hard....
And my teacher say thatwe are not doing well in exam.....
Need to put more effort in my studys.....
Jia you...