Hurt....

Today happen something that hurts me.......

I feel it cause the person hurt me is my friends....
Friends that go back together with me.....
Friends whom i know since form 5 ...
Friends whom i usually talk to....

But now....... i feel so hurt........

Today, there is a meeting.....
It is library AJK tertinggi meeting.
Teacher-in-charge wants to see all the AJK Tertinggi.
I am one of it.
And my friend, xin ning whom i called da jie.
Da jie did not even know got this meeting.
Until i tell her today morning....
I am thinking why are they did not even tall xin ning got this meeting.

So both of us going to library during second recess time...
We go and buy some thing and at the counter there, there is no librarian.
So we volunteer ourself to jaga there. Cause a lot of people go to buy things.
We also waiting for the meeting.
After one hour, da jie noticed that my friend who is our pengerusi enter one room and she did not come out again.
Then we ask our another friend.
This is wat she reply : 'why are you all still here? They are having meeting inside.'

After hearing that, i am so so so angry.
Why they did not even call us???
I was so angry until i wanted to throw something.

First time in school.
I angry until i want to throw something.
Then da jie was cooling me down....
And then i think the AJK tertinggi only pengerusi and setiausaha, and all the naib.
And i am going back to duty.

Then, i saw someone who is same pangkat as us got go to the meeting.
The first thought is r we not people?
Are we not AJK tertinggi?
Why is treating us like nobody?
Am us a invisible person?
Can't u see us there?

Last time during the interview also like this......
They only ask the friend...
They seems to forget who i am...

I am so so angry.....
The next thought is because i am not smart.
I cannot reach their level in study...

I HATE THIS KIND OF LIFE......

SOMEBODY RESCUE ME OUT FROM THIS LIFE!!!!!

Everyday, i am going back with them...
Everyday facing these things.....
I am becoming a nobody...
I am become an invisible person....

They won ask my opinion....
And they won tell me what is their decision....

I HATE THIS LIFESTYLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I want to break free.....
I don want to life in that kind of life again.....

I want to tell them.
But i am so so scare.....

Hurt cos being abandon by my friends.............
Hurt cos they don understand me...............
Hurt cos they just think themself...........
Hurt cos they won treat me as human......
Hurt cos i am nothing to them.......

HURT.................

MY HEART IS BLEEDING..... SUFFERING.....AND HATE........

I WANT TO BREAK FREE...........